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Thursday, November 11, 2010

The Tear Streaked Army Is Here!

You might see an odd clustering of negs on Toylit. They couldn't send me their tears, so they're sending me the next best thing. I know! When did I get three new girlfriends? In my new book, How to Alienate People for Fun and No Profit I share all the secrets of antagonizing the dolts of this world.

If you want to join in on the fun, go hit the page of Poemblaze (Matt Quinn) and laugh at his terrible poetry. Put your critiques/responses up here too--the guy's got an itchy censorship finger (or maybe masturbation has gotten it strong & impatient). Toylit is already a top Google result for 'Matt Quinn' and 'poemblaze1,' but really, that's not good enough. Let's add 'poemblaze' to the mix. I think his oneshotpoetry pals think they're helping him by hitting this site. Bad form. They're afraid of their own negative critique. Too bad they don't know that I LOVE fighting against an unjust cause. Bad poetry MUST be destroyed. This guy Quinn, is not only a shitty poet, but plays the Uriah Heep as an insincere sycophant. Here's an example from his twitter feed:

"@AnnaLefler I appreciate your thinking about me."
"@Cecilyk Blog about what you feel the urge to blog about, what satisfies you. If it's true to your heart, write it, if not, no need."

And my favorite...

"@KimberlyKinrade You're welcome. What I appreciate most is being able to talk about something without anger."

Wants to be a paragon & an aww shucks nice guy. For contrast, let's not forget this thread:

"Self-indulgent. Why the linebreaks? I think this would be unremarkable prose & I think you know it too, which is why you broke the lines--to add 'gravitas' to the comp.

I know you think I'm being mean here, so let me use examples:

1) You use the language of lovers, but utterly ignore exploring the concept. It undercuts the poem's intention, because here you go, saying you have a deep connection to words, but then go on to act superficially. Your speech act is defied by the way you scribe it.
2) How do books with nothing in them a) transmit words, b) get called books at all, instead of sheafs of paper?

You can do way better than this. What would the books say if they saw you holding yourself to such a low standard?"

The guy is so terrified of a negative review, he moderates his comments section. I had to circumvent his efforts at censorship by reposting the critique here:

"The books had words in them and then poured them into the sleeper's ear. That is why they are blank in the morning. You are mentally ill. Get help. You have a lot of knowledge, but paranoid thinking and need to be the authority are keeping you from what you could be. I suspect you are off meds or that you have never sought help though I am sure others have suggested it." Matt Quinn,

Remember kids, this is the same guy who says things like: "@KimberlyKinrade You're welcome. What I appreciate most is being able to talk about something without anger."

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