Toylit

All the News in Witty Print. Quality Reading Material for the (M)asses Since 2000.

Friday, October 01, 2010

Cult of the Balloonist and the Flea [Today's News Poem, October 1, 2010]

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Cult of the Balloonist and the Flea [Today's News Poem, October 1, 2010] The balloonist was a showman, scammer, ne'er do well Who...

Ceiling Cat Is Watching You Sin [#twitterfoundpoem, October 1, 2010]

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Ceiling Cat Is Watching You Sin [#twitterfoundpoem, October 1, 2010] Tweets+Edits=#twitterfoundpoem Two producers battle to determine su...
Thursday, September 30, 2010

White-Collar Mummy [Today's News Poem, September 30, 2010]

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White-Collar Mummy [Today's News Poem, September 30, 2010] Rubber slugs in your pocket shed Liquid crystal-like tears, then cracked ...

Those Dark Color Rings Around Uranus [#twitterfoundpoem, September 30, 2010]

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Those Dark Color Rings Around Uranus [#twitterfoundpoem, September 30, 2010] Tweets+Edits=#twitterfoundpoem Ever wonder how to make your ...
Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Teach Them Who's Top Predator! [Bonus Poem, September 29, 2010]

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Teach Them Who's Top Predator! [Bonus Poem, September 29, 2010] Cats are green like money in the eye, Soft as zero carbon footprints,...

Annihilism [Today's News Poem, September 29, 2010]

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Annihilism [Today's News Poem, September 29, 2010] With leftover organs, Destroyer had molded A paragon: fingers for checking the pul...
3 comments:

Adolescent Middle Age Crisis [#twitterfoundpoem, September 29, 2010]

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Adolescent Middle Age Crisis [#twitterfoundpoem, September 29, 2010] Tweets+Edits=#twitterfoundpoem The Middle Age Crisis is Hitting a Y...
Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Pine Lethe [Today's News Poem, September 28, 2010]

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Pine Lethe [Today's News Poem, September 28, 2010] You aren't worth the poem it would take to explain. Or maybe you are, but I ...

Plebeian Gasses [#twitterfoundpoem, September 28, 2010]

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Plebeian Gasses [#twitterfoundpoem, September 28, 2010] Tweets+Edits=#twitterfoundpoem The noble gasses are on the far right, but There ...
Monday, September 27, 2010

A Strong Force [Today's News Poem, September 27, 2010]

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A Strong Force [Today's News Poem, September 27, 2010] I'd sink to the center of mass if I could; Resisting your efforts to lift ...

Jus Another Act of Lokoness... lol [#twitterfoundpoem, September 27, 2010]

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Jus Another Act of Lokoness... lol [#twitterfoundpoem, September 27, 2010] Tweets+Edits=#twitterfoundpoem Breaking news! CLEARLY ur ass ...
Sunday, September 26, 2010

In Search of the Cutting Edge [Today's News Poem, September 26, 2010]

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In Search of the Cutting Edge [Today's News Poem, September 26, 2010] I) Gnomanism Searched for the keyword 'love' on Google...
2 comments:

Flawed Elixer [#twitterfoundpoem, September 26, 2010]

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Flawed Elixer [#twitterfoundpoem, September 26, 2010] Tweets+Edits=#twitterfoundpoem Pop goes the brain cells. A sickly pink liquid that...
Saturday, September 25, 2010

Perishable Expectations [Today's News Poem, September 25, 2010]

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Perishable Expectations [Today's News Poem, September 25, 2010] Weaponized giggles, leisure transactions: Full contact word sport. E...

Something Unexpected [#twitterfoundpoem, September 25, 2010]

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Something Unexpected [#twitterfoundpoem, September 25, 2010] Tweets+Edits=#twitterfoundpoem i am as mad as his dick is small. angryyyyyy...
Friday, September 24, 2010

Commuting by Limo [Today's News Poem, September 24, 2010]

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Commuting by Limo [Today's News Poem, September 24, 2010] Market the beast with a ticket of plastic; Swallow your interest with relis...

The Ecstasy of Saint Cthulu [#twitterfoundpoem, September 24, 2010]

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The Ecstasy of Saint Cthulu [#twitterfoundpoem, September 24, 2010] Tweets+Edits=#twitterfoundpoem I was referring to the ancient rivalry...
Thursday, September 23, 2010

Certainty Principle [Today's News Poem, September 23, 2010]

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Certainty Principle [Today's News Poem, September 23, 2010] Eye like the barrel. Destroy what you see. Uncertain as principle Boxed...

Eating the Courage of the Mama Grizzly's Offspring [#twitterfoundpoem, September 23, 2010]

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Eating the Courage of the Mama Grizzly's Offspring [#twitterfoundpoem, September 23, 2010] Tweets+Edits=#twitterfoundpoem I am The ma...
Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Citizen-Dictator of the World [Today's News Poem, September 22, 2010]

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Citizen-Dictator of the World [Today's News Poem, September 22, 2010] Mention it in passing, if at all. That's important. Please ...
1 comment:

Slappers, Weirdos, Chavs, Footie Lads and Normal People GO COMPARE GO COMPARE Outreach Programmes [#twitterfoundpoem, September 22, 2010]

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Slappers, Weirdos, Chavs, Footie Lads and Normal People GO COMPARE GO COMPARE Outreach Programmes [#twitterfoundpoem, September 22, 2010] T...
1 comment:

only if you want [Bonus Poem, September 22, 2010]

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only if you want [Bonus Poem, September 22, 2010] angels cut off part of your foot kiss your cheek and ask if you still want to they...
1 comment:
Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Chalk-Fruit of Knowledge [Today's News Poem, September 21, 2010]

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Chalk-Fruit of Knowledge [Today's News Poem, September 21, 2010] The schoolmaster claps her erasers together And figurines form from ...
2 comments:

When We Arise and Transform! [#twitterfoundpoem, September 21, 2010]

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When We Arise and Transform! [#twitterfoundpoem, September 21, 2010] Tweets+Edits=#twitterfoundpoem We are Sterling robots in our FINEST ...
Monday, September 20, 2010

Lifelong Recession [Today's News Poem, September 20, 2010]

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Lifelong Recession [Today's News Poem, September 20, 2010] Ghost in straight lines. What can you touch? Red hair was fine, You sham...

Vapor Threat-Management [#twitterfoundpoem,September 20, 2010]

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Vapor Threat-Management [#twitterfoundpoem,September 20, 2010] Tweets+Edits=#twitterfoundpoem being a dead employee ought to count for s...
1 comment:
Sunday, September 19, 2010

Guinea Pig's Lament [Today's News Poem, September 19, 2010]

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Guinea Pig's Lament [Today's News Poem, September 19, 2010] You put up my photo on Craigslist: A cowlick of calico squealing Tha...

Animal, Mineral, Vegetable [#twitterfoundpoem, September 19, 2010]

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Animal, Mineral, Vegetable [#twitterfoundpoem, September 19, 2010] Tweets+Edits=#twitterfoundpoem ANIMAL NITRATE SUEDE soup made a delig...
Saturday, September 18, 2010

Package Tours Through Spirit Worlds [Today's News Poem, September 18, 2010]

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Package Tours Through Spirit Worlds [Today's News Poem, September 18, 2010] Note the grubby toes his sandals expose. Step inside and ...

Investments in Disease [#twitterfoundpoem, September 18, 2010]

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Investments in Disease [#twitterfoundpoem, September 18, 2010] Tweets+Edits=#twitterfoundpoem Invest in spongiform brain diseases. love ...
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Khakjaan Wessington
Khakjaan Wessington is America's most irritable poet.
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